by Scott O’Neill The Night Guard trudges his morose rounds through the dungeon. “Prisoners, my very soul aches. I’ll free whosoever makes me laugh!” Sullen silence. Then, a knock-knock joke croaks through shattered teeth. “Not funny.” Puns wheeze from a thumb-screwed thief. “Not funny.” Finally, a raunchy jest about lusty widows coaxes chuckles from even […]
by Tim Law Sally, Michelle, and Tiffany. That trio made my high school years hell. The queens of the school whose laugh haunted me throughout my early adult years. Tiff was the worst. Those few friends I had turned against me thanks to her lies. She walks into the studio, Smyth, about to become Brown. […]
by Andreas Flögel Smoking gun in hand, Jack stood in the children’s room. The sight of his shot-down sons was horrifying. Knowing this had been the only way to spare them further suffering offered no comfort. The ‘laughing virus’ (no one could remember the scientific name) was deadly and extremely contagious. Those infected died from […]
by Laurence Croft Tom used to play a cruel joke on me: he would put his hand in front of his mouth, preventing me from lipreading, then say stuff that made his mates laugh. I’ll never know what he said, but their mockery made me so miserable that I ended up on sertraline. So, one […]
by Corinne Pollard Cracker jokes aren’t funny. Yet when it flutters out from my paper hat, I feel obliged to read it out loud. “What do you call an elderly snowman?” I pause. “A puddle.” Most groan, some roll their eyes, but Aunt Iris, who’d been at the sherry, laughs. I smile at her silliness, […]
by Jeff Currier For Max, it began as a low rumbling chuckle. For Helen, a delicate tittering giggle. Inevitably though, it slowly swelled, gleeful chortling burgeoning into gut-clenching rambunctious hilarity. Like all laughter, it was contagious. It spread unchecked, a convulsing wave of mirth, drowning the entire world in uproarious pandemonium. They tried regaining control. […]
by Liam Hogan “Select squares with TRAFFIC LIGHTS.” My fist slammed down. I muttered a sorry and the internet cafe owner retook his stool. But bloody hell! This was my third CAPTCHA. All I wanted was a cheap flight, and the damned system kept kicking me back to the beginning like it was trying to […]
by Evan Baughfman Andy hasn’t eaten. Never a good idea. Empty belly means “hanger” consumes the best of him. In the company parking garage, Andy finds a freshly installed vending machine. He inserts a few coins. Pushes buttons. The machine whirs. Doesn’t drop the desired pastry. Cursing, Andy kicks, dents the machine. Shoulder-checks the contraption. […]
by Andreas Flögel When Peter called for the waiter, the anger in his voice was indisputable. He held a fork at the lower end, pointing it at the staff member. “I know this is no five-star establishment. Nevertheless, this is simply unacceptable. The cutlery is dirty.” The waiter leaned in to inspect the fork. “I […]
by Jennifer Jorgensen Water sprayed the front of Alycia’s shirt as she pushed the plunger over and over, faster and faster. She was sick of her husband’s video game addiction. Her interruptions were annoying? She showed him what annoyance was. She hit the flusher. The bowl gurgled in defeat. Despite everything, she did need a […]