by Corinne Pollard Cracker jokes aren’t funny. Yet when it flutters out from my paper hat, I feel obliged to read it out loud. “What do you call an elderly snowman?” I pause. “A puddle.” Most groan, some roll their eyes, but Aunt Iris, who’d been at the sherry, laughs. I smile at her silliness, […]
by Jeff Currier For Max, it began as a low rumbling chuckle. For Helen, a delicate tittering giggle. Inevitably though, it slowly swelled, gleeful chortling burgeoning into gut-clenching rambunctious hilarity. Like all laughter, it was contagious. It spread unchecked, a convulsing wave of mirth, drowning the entire world in uproarious pandemonium. They tried regaining control. […]
by Liam Hogan “Select squares with TRAFFIC LIGHTS.” My fist slammed down. I muttered a sorry and the internet cafe owner retook his stool. But bloody hell! This was my third CAPTCHA. All I wanted was a cheap flight, and the damned system kept kicking me back to the beginning like it was trying to […]
by Evan Baughfman Andy hasn’t eaten. Never a good idea. Empty belly means “hanger” consumes the best of him. In the company parking garage, Andy finds a freshly installed vending machine. He inserts a few coins. Pushes buttons. The machine whirs. Doesn’t drop the desired pastry. Cursing, Andy kicks, dents the machine. Shoulder-checks the contraption. […]
by Andreas Flögel When Peter called for the waiter, the anger in his voice was indisputable. He held a fork at the lower end, pointing it at the staff member. “I know this is no five-star establishment. Nevertheless, this is simply unacceptable. The cutlery is dirty.” The waiter leaned in to inspect the fork. “I […]
by Jennifer Jorgensen Water sprayed the front of Alycia’s shirt as she pushed the plunger over and over, faster and faster. She was sick of her husband’s video game addiction. Her interruptions were annoying? She showed him what annoyance was. She hit the flusher. The bowl gurgled in defeat. Despite everything, she did need a […]
by Scott O’Neill Buzzing fluorescent tubes fitfully illuminated the dank, cluttered hostel basement. “The washer’s munted.” Whirling and dropping laundry, the American girl gawped at Noah. “Jeez! You scared me! That accent… Australia?” Leaning against a red-spattered freezer, Noah grimaced. “New Zealand.” Her brow furrowed. “Not Australia?” “Decidedly not.” “Our exchange student had an Australian […]
by Madeline Mora-Summonte The music, always so loud. Edna asks, begs, demands. The neighbours next door stare blankly, deny, close the door in her face. Fury scorches her. Then, the icy focus finds her. Happens every time. That night, Edna pads across the back lawn, hatchet in hand. She slashes, silences the stereo, radio, phone. […]
by Lauren Dennis Putting my fist through Valerie’s shit-eating grin is akin to feeding it into the office industrial shredder. Her teeth slice my skin, sending shards of enamel and flesh plopping into Susan’s coffee. The blood and icing-coated knife in Valerie’s shaking hand narrowly misses my cheek, allowing me to slam her skull against […]
by Jonathan Tolstedt The contractor pointed out three places where nails I had driven into studs had broken through the sides of the noggins. Three nails out of how many thousands I had put into this house? He told me to fix them and went on about how he puts a part of himself into […]