Welcome to Hell! Can I just get your name and method of death? You weren’t aware you were dead? I’m sorry you had to find out this way, but I really do need that information for our records. You see, upper management loves their numbers. No worries, I can look you up. Oh, ouch. It says here you died by…peeing in the Amazon. You’d be surprised how many of those we see here. A piranha just snatched your peeper right off ya. Would you like to see the recording? No? Alrighty then, just enter the queue over there. Enjoy eternity!